In a move intended to outflank the Conservatives in the run-up to the next election, the government has announced a major shake-up of sentencing policy.

The move was welcomed by all sections of the Labour Party as a practical way of reducing population-pressure on UK jails that are bursting at the seams. And, at the same time, it is seen as going some way towards granting real equality to immigrants.

The Home Secretary, former postman Alan Johnson, said the government was proud to introduce the new law. “This legislation achieves three main objectives. First, it will save millions of pounds by emptying our prisons and putting immigrants who break the law back into society where they belong. Secondly, it will remove the stigma of prison sentences from immigrants, especially those who are newly-arrived and haven’t yet attuned to our way of life. After all, it’s a sad fact that immigrants, especially those from war-torn African countries, are far more likely to stab or rape someone than people who have lived here for a while. In short, they don’t know any better and we must make allowances. Thirdly, by demonstrating compassion and putting them into council houses rather than simply locking them up like the Tories would like to do, we can stimulate the construction industry by making necessary the building of more council accommodation”.

The new legislation, which is to be rushed through the Commons, will mean that anyone from an ethic minority must be sentenced to community orders and/or probation if found guilty of any offence other than the most serious such as murder. Discussions are still in progress regarding murder convictions, but it is understood that suspended sentences will be recommended.